Friday, May 06, 2011

Provenance Of Office Food

I'm not here to discuss the banana guacamole you had stolen out of the office refrigerator.  I'm not even here to discuss the lunatic in the next cube that has a case of Tab on her desk with a post it note reading "30ยข".  Because, yeah, somebody is going to buy a can of Tab from this woman.

No what I want to consider is the obviously free food that is left out.  I just walked past our office kitchenette and there was a tray of brownies sitting there.  A tray of very dried out, crumbling brownies which is a capital crime.  At least it should be.

It is commonly known that it is open season on any food left on this counter.  Even if this was a tray of mouth-watering, gooey, dark chocolate fudge brownies with sprinkles though I wouldn't touch them.  My floor of the office has somewhere north of 100 residents.  The food there is troubling.  The same thing can be said about the random cookies and candy left on the printer table.  FSM knows I'm no germaphobe.  I'm not worried about cleanliness or disease although maybe I should be.  I've eaten food stacked on window sills here when told about it.

That's the crux of the problem. The anonymity.  Who's was it?  Why did they only eat a 1/4 of their brownies?  Not knowing where its from and/or why it is there makes it unappealing to me.

Right now, after writing this post, if I were to receive an email from Mike on the infrastructure team - or any somewhat random person - that the brownies were left over from a meeting I would be willing to go eat one.  That is if they were gooey and and warm and yummy instead of all cracked and dried out.

Maybe we could just flog the person that dried out those poor, poor brownies instead of strapping them in the electric chair.  I'll have to put a think on that.

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